doodle – Page 12 – Hey, Look! A Writer Fellow!

July 15, 2014August 3, 2014

Win a Doodle! Win a Doodle! Win a Doodle!

In March, I hosted a contest. The grand (and only) prize was an official, original, custom-made Mike Allegra doodle.

Despite my doodling ability, the number of people who entered this contest was pretty large. This surprised me.

What also surprised me was that some of you reeeeally wanted that ding-dang doodle. In fact, a few people threatened to sic their cats on me if I didn’t do another doodle contest post haste.

To these people I say settle down because here’s another chance to win a doodle!

IF YOU WIN, I WILL DRAW WHATEVER YOU WANT!

Don’t believe me? Here’s proof:

Jenion (the winner of the March contest) wanted a drawing of a bicycle racer. So I drew her a bicycle racer.

But here is real proof: I am not fond of cats. (I am horribly allergic and keep rodents as pets.) But, once upon a time, Jilanne Hoffmann’s punk kid asked for a drawing of a cat. So I drew him a cat.

Then Jilanne Hoffmann’s punk kid asked for a drawing of a kitten. So I drew him a kitten.

Did I mention that Jilanne Hoffmann’s kid is a punk? Well, he is.

So, yes, I will doodle whatever you want.

Well there is one caveat: I will not draw whatever you want if your wanted whatever is perverted. I am a children’s book author; behave yourself!

HOW TO WIN

The winning name will be drawn from a hat. The fellow drawing the name will be this guy.

He is fair, impartial, and looks like a 19th century bare-knuckled pugilist.

HOW TO ENTER

To get your name in the hat, all you need to do is leave a comment with some Words of Wisdom.

To get the ball rolling, here are some actual Words of Wisdom from my parents:

Mom: “Don’t be a candy ass.”

Dad: “The ox is slow but the Earth is patient.”

Mom’s wisdom usually came in the form of vague threats.

Dad’s wisdom usually sounded like its was written by a Confucius in need of a designated driver.

You can do better than this. I know you can. I’m counting on you.

HOW TO INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF WINNING

I’ll add two more ballots to the hat if you announce this contest on your blog and link back to this page. So, yes, you can get three chances to win!

Don’t have a blog? OK, then you can get one extra ballot if you announce this contest (and link back to this page) on your Facebook page or Twitter feed.

DEADLINES, ETC.

Your Words of Wisdom are due on or before Monday, July 21.

The winner of the drawing will be announced on July 22.

The completed doodle will be posted on my blog. The original drawing (suitable for framing) will be mailed to the winner.

Also, cheaters will be stabbed.

So get going! I need all the Words of Wisdom I can get!

GOOD LUCK!

April 12, 2014April 12, 2014

Celebrate Dueling Doodlers!

Remember that Celebrate Kittens doodle I did a couple of weeks back?

Well, because Jilanne Hoffmann’s son is a fine, upstanding young fellow, he doodled me a reply. Head on over to her blog and check out his awesome art, why don’cha?

(Oh, and I’m turnin’ off the comments here. Go comment over there!)

Celebrate Dueling Doodlers!

March 30, 2014

Celebrate Kittens! (Oh, you gotta be kidding me!)

As many longtime readers of this blog know, I am not a big fan of cats. I’m allergic, I keep rodents as pets, and feral cats keep pooping on my lawn.

So why did I ever draw the above doodle? Extortion.

Last year, Jilianne Hoffmann demanded it as a quid pro quo for promoting my noble organization, H.A.C.K.S. (Humans Against Celebrity Kid Stories)* on her blog. I, with great reluctance, complied.

After I drew the doodle and sent it to the Hoffmanns, however, something strange happened. Jilanne’s son, Liam (the fellow who wanted that cat pic), and I developed a correspondence. In so doing, I slowly learned that he and the entire Hoffmann family – despite their cat fancier instincts – are lovely people.

This knowledge has helped me to grow significantly as a person. And I am grateful.

As a sign of this newfound friendship, I offered to draw the Hoffmann’s another doodle.

Jilanne replied: “Oh, you are too kind! Liam is very excited. When I asked him if he had a request, he immediately grinned and said, ‘a very naughty kitten to go with the naughty stamp-shredding cat.'”

Are you people trying to get back on my Enemies List?

Fine! Here! And no more!

*By the way, you should join H.A.C.K.S.

It’s free and fun! No salesmen will call!

To learn all about it, click here! To join the cause, click here!