cats – Hey, Look! A Writer Fellow!

July 7, 2022July 8, 2022

Is there a Capybara Appreciation Day?

What a great question! And YES! There is a Capybara Appreciation Day! And it’s coming SOON!

Sunday, July 10 is the big day, and thank goodness, for no creature on this big rock we all live on is more worthy of appreciation.

For those of you who’ve never heard of these guys (and for shame!), capybaras are the world’s largest rodent. They are native to South America, semi-aquatic, can weigh more than 100 pounds, and are very, very cute.

Unofficially known as “coconut doggos” and “guinea bigs,” these fine, floofy, fellas are devoted herd animals. If a capybara doesn’t have a herd of other capybaras to mingle with, she’ll happily assemble a new herd consisting of other species. Don’t believe me? Well, the internet is jam-packed with photos of capys lazily snuggling with turtles, birds, monkeys, dogs, cats, goats, pigs, guinea pigs, and about a zillion other things—so stop being such a contrarian, it’s unseemly.

Look! This capybara is hanging with a freakin’ alligator! Or maybe it’s a caiman? All I know is that thing is big and scary and Mr. Capy is like, “No biggie.”

So how can one properly celebrate this holiday?

That’s another excellent question! I have three suggestions:

1. Peruse the internet for photos and stories about capybaras. The more you learn, the more you’ll love these guys.

For example, did you hear about the capybaras who invaded a wealthy gated community in Argentina?

Did you hear about the capy (named Cheesecake) who serves as a foster mom to litters of puppies?

This is Cheesecake. Image owned by Rocky Ridge Refuge.

And did you know that if you pet a capybara in just the right way, she will floof her fur and collapse into a state of sleepy bliss? ‘Tis true!

2. Go visit your local zoo or wildlife sanctuary and see these critters up close.

Note: They’ll probably just be lying around. Unlike most rodents, capybaras don’t do many things with much urgency. Remember, capybaras are not here to entertain you; they’re here to gently encourage you to adopt a more Zen-like lifestyle.

3. Last but not least, consider preordering a book about capybaras. Not just any book, of course; that would be foolish. You’ll want to find a book that got a really, really good review from Kirkus.

This might fit the bill. Click **here** to preorder.

So mark your calendars, my friends, and be sure to have a happy capy day! WOO!

You know your publisher likes you when you get this little guy in the mail. Thanks, Lizzy!

March 10, 2015March 12, 2015

Win A Doodle! Woo!

When I posted my first “Win a Doodle!” contest last year, my motives were simple: I didn’t have a post but I still wanted to post something. I figured that maybe a dozen blog followers would enter. Instead, the comments section went nutty. I was bewildered.

So I did the doodle contest thing a few months later – and that turnout was even nuttier.

It’s been a quite a while since my last doodle contest — and a few of you rabble rousers won’t let me forget it. I have been harassed! Harangued! Badgered! Bullied!

And, like France on the eve of a major war, I have capitulated.

Here’s another chance to win your very own doodle!

IF YOU WIN, I WILL DRAW WHATEVER YOU WANT!

Yep. It’s true. Need proof? Fine.

Jenion, the winner of the first doodle contest, is an avid cyclist. She asked me to doodle a cyclist. So I did.

Kid Lit Reviews, the winner of the second contest, is a devoted animal rights advocate. She asked me to draw a picture of a Great Dane protecting a few smaller dogs. So I did.

Aw! Look at the puppehs! (Click to see larger.)

On another occasion, Jilanne Hoffman’s punk kid, ignoring the fact that I do not like cats, asked me to draw a picture of a cat.

Then that punk kid asked me to draw a kitten.

Oh, whatta punk that kid is!

So yes. I will draw whatever you want.

Well, there is one exception. I won’t draw what you want if what you want is pervy. I am a children’s book author, bucko, so take your dirty business somewhere else!

There is one other point to consider. I am not a portrait artist, so if you ask me to draw a picture of you, I will cheat. My friend and fellow blogger, Vanessa Chapman, learned this the hard way.

HOW TO WIN

The winning name will be drawn at random. The draw-er is this guy.

He’s nutty, but his integrity is unimpeachable.

HOW TO ENTER

To get your name in the drawing all you need to do is leave a comment that answers the following question:

If you could have any fictional character as a pet, which character would you choose and why?

The “why” is key. If you just yell something like “SCOOBY DOO!” your name will not be included in the drawing. You need to explain your choice.

Got it?

HOW TO INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF WINNING

Want me to stuff the ballot box in your favor? Fine. I’ll add two more ballots if you announce this contest on your blog and link back to this page. That’s three chances to win!

Don’t have a blog? OK, then you can get one extra ballot if you announce this contest on your Facebook page or Twitter feed.

DEADLINES, ETC.

Your entry is due on or before Monday, March 16. The winner of the drawing will be announced on Tuesday, March 17.

The completed doodle will be posted on this blog. The original drawing (suitable for framing!) will be mailed to the winner.

That’s it! Answer the question and get going!

GOOD LUCK!

July 15, 2014August 3, 2014

Win a Doodle! Win a Doodle! Win a Doodle!

In March, I hosted a contest. The grand (and only) prize was an official, original, custom-made Mike Allegra doodle.

Despite my doodling ability, the number of people who entered this contest was pretty large. This surprised me.

What also surprised me was that some of you reeeeally wanted that ding-dang doodle. In fact, a few people threatened to sic their cats on me if I didn’t do another doodle contest post haste.

To these people I say settle down because here’s another chance to win a doodle!

IF YOU WIN, I WILL DRAW WHATEVER YOU WANT!

Don’t believe me? Here’s proof:

Jenion (the winner of the March contest) wanted a drawing of a bicycle racer. So I drew her a bicycle racer.

But here is real proof: I am not fond of cats. (I am horribly allergic and keep rodents as pets.) But, once upon a time, Jilanne Hoffmann’s punk kid asked for a drawing of a cat. So I drew him a cat.

Then Jilanne Hoffmann’s punk kid asked for a drawing of a kitten. So I drew him a kitten.

Did I mention that Jilanne Hoffmann’s kid is a punk? Well, he is.

So, yes, I will doodle whatever you want.

Well there is one caveat: I will not draw whatever you want if your wanted whatever is perverted. I am a children’s book author; behave yourself!

HOW TO WIN

The winning name will be drawn from a hat. The fellow drawing the name will be this guy.

He is fair, impartial, and looks like a 19th century bare-knuckled pugilist.

HOW TO ENTER

To get your name in the hat, all you need to do is leave a comment with some Words of Wisdom.

To get the ball rolling, here are some actual Words of Wisdom from my parents:

Mom: “Don’t be a candy ass.”

Dad: “The ox is slow but the Earth is patient.”

Mom’s wisdom usually came in the form of vague threats.

Dad’s wisdom usually sounded like its was written by a Confucius in need of a designated driver.

You can do better than this. I know you can. I’m counting on you.

HOW TO INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF WINNING

I’ll add two more ballots to the hat if you announce this contest on your blog and link back to this page. So, yes, you can get three chances to win!

Don’t have a blog? OK, then you can get one extra ballot if you announce this contest (and link back to this page) on your Facebook page or Twitter feed.

DEADLINES, ETC.

Your Words of Wisdom are due on or before Monday, July 21.

The winner of the drawing will be announced on July 22.

The completed doodle will be posted on my blog. The original drawing (suitable for framing) will be mailed to the winner.

Also, cheaters will be stabbed.