The flowers are in bloom and there’s more pollen in the air than actual air.
So, with my eyes itching and nose a-trickle, I’ve been hiding out in the house watching The Maltese Falcon.
To commemorate allergy season and my love of classic film noir, I give you my latest doodle:
A Phlegm Fatale!
So! How are you holding up allergy-wise?
Hey, Look! A Writer Fellow! 
I’m with Ellen–toss a Kleenex on that thing and wash your hands! Where’s the Lysol?
I bathe in Lysol this time of year.
No doubt Benadryl is on your best friend list as well. Pollen is floating on the lake and swimmers are coming back out slimey. 🤢
That’s the opposite of what a swim should be!
I know that chickie well! It seems she haunts me constantly. Now that I see this portrayal I know why, she’s really gross.
It’s hard to combine sexy and gross. In fact, methinks it might be impossible.
Godspeed in keeping your nasal passages clear!
Hay fever is run amok in Texas. We have had stuff in bloom since February though! Grass and trees are THE worst down here right now. We take Clariton or Zyrtec everyday to try and keep the symptoms at bay. Then the fall brings the weeds..ugh! Drinking lots of water and keeping non-drowsy antihistamines on board is the only way to get through the season. 😒
Hang in there Courtney. Allergy season will soon be over.
Wait. Just how long is a Texan allergy season?
Well… we get a break for about 3 months during the “winter” 😂
🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧
You should consider a state with seasons.
If you move to New Jersey, I’ll buy you a coffee.
I have been to NJ a few times. I really like PA. Spent some time there training for the franchise we owned. I don’t like that evil white stuff though! 😂
My plan is to move to PA once Alex graduates from high school (the schools in our town are second to none.)
But don’t worry too much about the white stuff. With each passing year our winters get shorter. (Dangit, global warming! Don’t you know how much I hate cutting the lawn?) So do consider a move. We’ll be pals!
We have friends who moved from TX to Redding, PA two falls ago. First winter was nothing.. almost no snow. Then y’all made up for it this season! Weren’t you still getting snow in APRIL?? 🤯 I had flowers and leaves by the end of Feb! I love TX too much to leave 😉
Yeah, we had an April snow, but that was to make up for a pretty snowless winter.
That chick is attacking me every time I step out of my place. It seems I can’t ever run fast enough from her. She must be good at hiding too. Because I never see her coming until it’s too late. I think she is immune against my Benadryl-Shield, I have around me. She must be a super Ninja! When she is done with me, my shield is all slimy and broken! :o)
Your symptoms seem a bit more extreme than mine. Have you considered a plastic bubble?
Lol, yeah but more like a bubble around my head. It might actually look cool, kind of an astronaut helmet! ;o))
That would look cool.
Thank goodness, I rarely am bothered by any seasonal allergies — except the pines in North Carolina 45 yrs ago — and I don’t live there. I don’t know, maybe Kleenex would be interested in your drawing for their ad campaign! You drew how you are feeling. 🙂
You’re an Ohioan, now, yes? How are your friends and loved ones faring?
Not so well. Dayton is the worst city for allergies. I think the nickname is Sinus Valley. I am just lucky.
You sure are lucky! (Sinus Valley is an awesome moniker, by the way.)
I’m on Ellen’s team with this one, and I have a boat load of Allegra!!
As you should. All Allegras are awesome.
Ewwwww! … I can see why she was grossed-out! 🙂 … it is however, a fine drawing. 🙂
“Gross and fine” is perhaps the highest compliment I could ever hope to expect for a vampy hunk of phlegm.
I’ve met the phlegm fatale and she is as gross in real life as your drawing is, Mike. I haven’t been able to decide if I have a cold or allergies unresponsive to my Allegra. I’ve been nursing a sore throat and cough. The only good thing hoarseness that is rather sexy (my assessment – can’t seen to get buy-in from my husband on this). -Molly
Allegras are never unresponsive; If you leave a comment, this Allegra will reply!
Get well, my friend. Here’s hoping my namesake allergy medication will do the trick for you soon!
Heck, she’s gorgeous.
Almost certainly the first and last time you will see a foxy hunk of mucus.
No allergies here. Thank GAWD!
Oh, and your Phlegm Fatale made me throw up a little in my mouth.
Thanks for that.
Anything for you, Boo.
good thing I love you. *snortz*
Oh, you!
Totally gross. Also clever.
I’m good with cleverly gross. So thanks!
Oh yes, I had a sputum-gag in the middle of the night. Ugh. It should be over soon (right?!)
“Sputum” is an incredible word, don’cha think? You should write a book about it, Lauri. It’s right up your alley!
I can barely see to type this because my eyes are so itchy and swollen. I swear my car is dark grey but I get into a yellow car every morning. I hate allergy season. 😦
Yeah. my blue car is now a lovely shade of green. Be strong and pop antihistamines, my friend.
How ironic my favorite brand is Allegra. 😃
As it should be! 🙂
👍🏻
She is, well, don’t tell her I said so, but totally freaking GROSS. Fortunately, she does not live with me nor near me. When I moved from the East Coast to the Left Coast, I suddenly had CA oak allergies. But after a couple of years, my body adjusted. No problems. When I moved back to the East Coast a few years ago, suddenly on May 1, whammy – allergies appeared when none had bothered to show before. Pollen pollen pollen, my body shouted. But again, the following year, the adjustment occurred, and now perhaps a bit of red eyes as spring springs, but no phlegm fatale. Thank gawd. I hope you get rid of her soon, my friend.
Dang, you must be part cyborg. I’ve never heard of a body adapting to allergens so quickly. There must be medicinal qualities in that ridiculous tea you drink.
That’s it! Let me know if you’d like me to send you some…🍵😏
Phlegm Fatale. Oh no! You poor thing. I am un-allergic, fortunately, since I live in the woods surrounded by cats and dogs. But I feel for you. Hope you’re feeling less phlegmy soon, Mike.
Thank you for the kind words, my friend. I look forward to emerging from the plastic bubble soon.
If you didn’t keep your house so clean, you might be less reactive to germs, Mike. That’s how I say healthy. Lol.